Saturday 30th December 2006 - U's 1-2 Burton: Not waving, but drowning

Cheerio then, 2006. And good riddance!

I can hardly bear the sight of the league tables printed there on the back page
Nothing we can do to change 'em, just wish we could rearrange 'em for a day
This year's been like a half-filled glass of wine that was corked and we couldn't drink
But at least the U's fans wanted it, they weren't the ones whose attitude did stink

What a good year for the moaners
Many groans still linger there
We couldn't stand another failure
Getting hard to even care
As the turncoats walk away
And we keep looking for donors
The only thing I have to say

It's been a good year for the moaners
After one full season in charge, we invited Buzz to fly off where others have fled
I guess the reason we're not singing, is we've shouted all the abuse that can be said
When I think of Northwich, Rushden and St Albans I have difficulty managing a word
And the name of that small village up the road must be neither seen nor heard

What a good year for the moaners
Too many still linger there
Now's the time to pull together
Time to show that we still care
Don't you dare to walk away
We're not ready yet for closure
'Cos we're still loud and proud although
It's been a good year for the moaners!

As far the average annus horribilus goes, the U's have had one pretty much on a par with any England team you could care to mention (football, rugby, cricket...) and that Iraqi chap who was all over the telly today. There were some good bits, of course - hey! we've got a better away record than Weymouth! - but they have been rather overshadowed by the long periods of crud in between. After Boxing Day's leftover turkey, could the United rustle up something tasty to see us into the New Year?

The day dawned bright and sunny but by kick-off time the skies were as depressingly leaden and grey as a Westlife ballad. JQ deemed only one change necessary from the Rushden defeat, replacing Josh Simpson with Danny Brown, but considered no goalkeeping sub necessary. Well, what were the chances of having a goalkeeper sent off twice inside a month, eh? The very idea.

Burton Albion had already defeated the U's 2-1 at their place back in September and have been steadily improving season by season, particularly now that they are full-time. Old Abbey favourite Gary Rowett lined up at left-back alongside such familiar faces as goal machine Daryl Clare, former United trialist Andy Ducros, former United target Jon Shaw and forty-plus keeper Kevin Poole, while player-manager Nigel Clough selected himself for the bench as injuries took their toll on his squad.

The crowd was again boosted to well over 3,000 thanks to the sterling work of the inestimable Messrs Jones and Saywell and their army of volunteers in filling the South Stand, although it seemed that some had been put off by the weather or perhaps United's recent dismal form. Didn't do much for me either, but duty calls.

Early pressure came from the hosts, attacking the NRE, but the nearest they could get was a Courtney Pitt cross which curled onto the roof of the net. The visitors responded with a Ducros corner on 6 which found John Brayford's head, but his nod was off target, while the corner taker blasted a free-kick into the wall three minutes later from 25 yards.

United hit back on 11 with a quick break but both Pitt's cross and ensuing corner were cleared by the Albion defence, and for all the United men's willingness to run, challenge and work for each other, it was the visitors who enjoyed greater quality possession and looked more likely to score.

The elements were also beginning to play their part, drizzle gradually becoming a downpour... with worse to come. Somewhere a bloke with a beard began making a list of animals to collect in, two by two.

Jon Brady deflected a Ducros shot wide on 16 and from the resultant corner Clare was presented with a clear shot on goal from eight yards which he somehow prodded wide. Ducros slid an effort across the box a minute later as Burton showed some of the passing and movement which did for United at the Pirelli Stadium.

The increasingly slippery surface did not help the visitors but suited the U's more direct style, aiming to hit the mobile front two as quickly as possible with support from the wide men and Rob Wolleaston galloping through from midfield while Brown played the holding role to good effect. And the potential for muddy sliding tackles was certainly not lost on the redoubtable likes of Andy Duncan.

Ducros was forced to withdraw through injury on 28, replaced by Keith Gilroy, and on the half-hour Wolleaston drew a save from Poole with a long-range daisy-cutter. Or in the circumstances, a divot-flattener. Rowett replied with a similar effort but fired well over. But United continued to battle gamely and on 32 came the nearest that either side had come thus far to breaking the stalemate.

It was the wing-heeled feet of Pitt which were the creators, the little winger sprinting down the left and arrowing over a tremendous cross which Michael Gash lunged towards to beat his marker and crash a header against the far post.

With the rain shower rapidly gaining an upgrade to a minor monsoon, all those players not equipped with gills or flippers (22, I think) began to struggle, and on 39 Poole's miscued clearance could find only Robbie Simpson on the edge of the box; but he could not bring it under control in time to get in a shot and was dispossessed. Another poor Poole kick a minute later (you'd think he'd do better in the rain with that name) found Brady somewhat further out, and his ill-advised attempt at a spectacular volley bobbled apologetically wide.

Some more neat approach play on 43 saw Clare set up Shaw for a shot from twelve yards, but his shot on the turn was scooped wide, and United had the last word of the half when Duncan headed Pitt's corner over the top.

So it was evens Stevens at the interval, rightly so, in a keenly fought contest which made up in effort what it sometimes lacked in quality. And as the conditions continued to deteriorate, we could only speculate as to how many players might emerge for part two resplendent in snorkel and wet suit. Gave a whole new meaning to 'bringing on the sub'...

As it turned out, the only change made was by either manager was to get Brady and Pitt to swap wings. JQ's Cunning Plan in full effect. Pitt cut in and fired wide on 47, Rowett replied with another off-target blaster on 52, but little had changed other than the intensity of the damp stuff tumbling and swirling from the darkening sky.

Then four minutes later, United were in front. It started with a Burton corner, which was hauled from the air by Paul Crichton. His bowl out sent Wolleaston galloping away down the right on the break, and his eventual cross found Gash drifting in unseen from the left at the far post. His shot was not especially powerful, but it was accurate, and a deflection from the in-sliding Darren Stride sent it skidding past Poole and into the net. 1-0.

The Abbey came to life, and with the hurricane showing no sign of slackening off, there seemed to be a genuine belief around the place that the U's could hold on for a much-needed victory. This was no day for nice passing football but perfect for 'winning ugly'.

Michael Morrison blocked a Paul Carden shot for a corner on 61 which was cleared by young Jordan Collins, enjoying an assured second appearance, and Burton changed strikers on 65 when Shaun Harrad replaced Shaw. The ball was still bouncing well on the sodden pitch, but now with a splash to boot, and it was a tribute to Ian Darler's team that the surface remained so playable. Just up the road the match between City and H****n was ten minutes away from being abandoned, as were other games up and down the country.

Lee Fowler replaced Terry Henshaw for the visitors on 70, Harrad had a shot clutched by Crichton on 72, and Brown became the contest's first bookee on 75 for fouling Brayford, a little harsh considering the slithery conditions. Clare tested Crichton's gloves on 79 but he held onto his shot well.

Burton had their tails up now and when a Clare blaster cannoned off Wolleaston for a corner, Gilroy's flag-kick sailed over a couple of amber-shirted heads, only to be rammed home from close range by a diving... Andy Duncan. Under little to no pressure from an opposing striker. Oh dear: 1-1.

A second shoddy goal conceded from a corner in two games, and all of a sudden a point seemed a really inviting outcome. Marcus Richardson and Josh Simpson immediately replaced Gash and Wolleaston and United rallied gamely. Next minute a dazzling flash of lightning lit up the sky, followed swiftly by a gigantic, rolling clap of thunder, and we all REALLY began to look forward to the sploshing walk home.

Crichton saved from Clare again on 86, the big striker seeming to plough through the sodden sod like a, well, plough. United bounced back two minutes later with a Brady cross which seemed to be cleared quite clearly by a Burton hand, but only a corner was awarded, which Morrison headed over. A mere two minutes' added time was indicated, partly, one suspected, because the ref wanted to get away as soon as possible too. An honourable draw awaited.

But this is of course Cambridge United that one is writing about here. No sooner had the added time board been displayed in its damp neon glory, than Pitt essayed an unwise sideways pass through a puddle in the middle of the park. It found only Harrad, and he seized the opportunity to hare clear of the square home defence, churning through the mud.

Duncan almost caught him as he reached the edge of the area, his tackle causing the striker to stumble and Crichton to hesitate, but with the ref keeping his whistle dry, Harrad ploughed on, knocking the ball past Crichton, following it then finally falling fully to the ground.

Ref Hodgson was in no doubt: penalty, and a second red card in three games for the hapless goalkeeper. It seemed a terribly harsh, black-and-white judgement given the treacherous conditions and the fact that Harrad was off balance long before he encountered Crichton.

The United No.1 was applauded sympathetically from the field and Danny Brown donned his red/brown jersey to face Clare.

Sadly it was no contest as the Albion hitman sent him the wrong way to tuck into the right-hand corner. 2-1.

The Burton players celebrated unnecessarily gleefully right in front of the NRE, notably Clare, and especially centre-back Ryan Austin, whose antagonistic gesturing might well have landed him in a whole heap of video trouble had this match been rather more high profile.

Mark Peters came on for Pitt and was pushed up front, but time was up, and the contest finished in bad-tempered style when Gilroy tried to pick a fight with Gier after an innocent tackle right on the final whistle. His and his colleagues' behaviour was unworthy and uncharacteristic of a Clough-managed team.

The amber hordes' sense of injustice and appreciation of their side's honest endeavour afforded them generous and sympathetic applause. They had deserved a draw, and but for the otherwise quiet man in black's decisions in the last five minutes, might even have snatched a win.

But the unpalatable reality is that United have lost nine home league games out of fourteen this season, and were it not for an away record that really is better than that of Weymouth, they would undoubtedly be in even greater trouble than they are already.

January 2007 brings six games, including three at home and two local derbies away, and some serious points-gathering will be required to keep our noses above water. Although there will hopefully be rather less H2O around after Hogmanay.

Happy New Year.

Player Ratings
Crichton 6. Good handling in difficult conditions and unlucky to be dismissed.
Gier 7. Showing signs of getting back to his swashbuckling best.
Morrison 7. Reliably competent.
Duncan 6. Doing fine until that o.g.
Collins 6. Kept it simple and again acquitted himself well.
Brady 6. Not at his best attack-wise but never stopped working.
Wolleaston 7. Marked improvement on recent form.
Brown 7. Hasn't had time to settle yet but he's getting there.
Pitt 7. Much better contribution with some splendid crossing. Shame one pass cost his side the match.
Gash 7. Busy and dangerous, scoring and hitting the post.
R.Simpson 6. Grafted tirelessly as ever without really hitting the heights.

J.Simpson 5. Put himself about to reasonable effect in last ten minutes.
Richardson 5. Energetic late appearance.
Peters - On for a matter of seconds without touching the ball.

Match Summary
A deserved point was cruelly snatched from United's grasp by late penalty decisions at both ends as a mini-typhoon descended on Newmarket Road in the last match of 2006. Let's all hope for an upturn in both our meteorological and footballing fortunes in 2007.

Man of the Match
Danny Brown. No-one really stood out in a solid team performance but he held things together pretty well considering he has played so few games for United so far in his preferred position. This is the sort of character we need right now.

Ref Watch
Hodgson 6. Reffed sympathetically and unobtrusively until it all went pear-shaped towards the end.

Soundtrack of the Year
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah 'In This Home On Ice'

Andrew Bennett

Now talk about it on the message board!

Previous match reports:
U's 0-1 Rushden & Diamonds
Histon 5-0 U's
Woking 0-1 U's
U's 0-2 St Albans
U's 1-3 Morecambe
U's 3-0 Gravesend
Grays 1-1 U's
Northwich 2-0 U's (FA Cup Qual)
U's 0-3 Oxford
U's 1-2 Crawley
U's 2-2 Altrincham
Burton 2-1 U's
U's 1-0 Stevenage
U's 1-1 Kidderminster
Forest Green 1-1 U's
U's 1-3 Exeter
Dagenham 2-0 U's
U's 1-2 Halifax
St Albans 1-1 U's
U's 0-1 Northwich Victoria

Pre-season match reports:
Histon 0-0 U's (3-4 on pens)
U's 1-3 Norwich
Fakenham 0-7 U's
Enfield FC 0-2 U's
Cambridge City 0-2 U's
U's 4-4 Ipswich
U's 0-4 West Ham
Bury Town 1-2 U's
Leyton 0-3 U's

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