Saturday 9th December 2006 - Woking 0-1 U's: Just hear those away bells jinglin'

Christmas continues to gather and swirl above us like a tornado over North London, and in advance of the second annual CUFC Carol Concert on Monday 18th, we are able to bring you a second sneak preview of the sort of festive fare on offer on the night, this time with a nod towards a certain cup match that is in the offing.

Good Histon men, rejoice
Your ground will hear a voice!
Trophy draw was made today
News! News!
The big match is Saturday!
At long last a decent crowd

No figures to massage now
Big match Saturday!
Big match Saturday!

Good Histon men, rejoice
The U's come in full voice
This is one they cannot miss
Joy! Joy!
Becky cannot wait for this
Tepid tea and cold shower
Loud music behind the door
Beck was born for this
Beck was born for this

Good Histon men, rejoice
Hear the glory-hunter's voice
Jack the prices up today
Christ! Christ!
Hear the U's fans rant and rave

Segregation, lots of Bill
Crowded pavement on the hill
U's fans rant and rave
U's fans rant and rave!

Before the Match of the Millennium, however, there was the little matter of a visit to Woking to negotiate for the Mighty U's after last week's shambolic effort against St Albans. Leafy Surrey was a welcoming venue last term with a 1-0 victory courtesy of Jamie Guy's sensational goal of the season, and the adjoining social club was no less cosy for the visiting supporters this year with comfortable surroundings, cold beer and hot food.

Kingfield has remained unchanged for some years now, the relatively new and impressive all-seater stand at one end dwarfing the rest of what is a resoundingly non-League ground, with two tiny, ancient stands alongside an open terraced area along one side, a covered terrace at t'other end, and an uncovered terrace all along the other side allocated to the 250-odd amber hordes. The day was sunny and cold, if not as chilly as last year when a flurry of snowflakes was seen before kickoff, although a darkening cloud took the sun away in ominous fashion just before three o'clock.

JQ was ruthless in altering the team from last week with three tactical changes in addition to two enforced amendments. Paul Crichton's suspension meant a long-awaited league debut for Shane Herbert while David Bridges' injury left the door open for Ritchie Hanlon's return. Marcus Richardson was dropped from the 16 to leave Robbie Simpson partnering Danny Carey-Bertram up front, Courtney Pitt replaced Josh Simpson in midfield, and as the formation was changed to 3-5-2, Stephen Smith became the extra man in the centre in place of Matt Bloomer. Pitt and Jon Brady have played as wing-backs before, so the only player in a totally unfamiliar position was Danny Brown as one of the three centre-backs.

Woking have been as inconsistent as the U's of late, with a 4-0 win over Weymouth sandwiched between four defeats. International keeper Shwan Jalal has moved on to Sheffield Wednesday and exciting young striker Giuseppe Sole was also missing, although top scorer Craig McAllister started, as did ex-U Danny Bunce at left-back, a talented player who many at the Abbey were sorry to see go.

The U's fans were pelted with lollipops before the start by Woking's mascot, some sort of mutant cat with human hands and feet (get the poor beggar a full costume, eh - don't want to spoil the magic for the kiddies) and the club had thoughtfully chained the wheelie bins on the away terrace to the barriers just in case anyone was tempted to return the favour.

As all too often of late, United started on the back foot and were pressed back by the hosts from the off, meaning that Brady and Pitt acted more like full-backs for the first half an hour in a 5-3-2. Presumably the first half was all about containing Woking and softening them up for the second.

Some sloppy passing by Hanlon on 3 allowed Chris Sharpling to burst clear down the right channel for Woking, but under pressure from Michael Morrison he blazed his shot wide from the edge of the area. There were more collywobbles for the U's two minutes later when big centre-back Tom Hutchinson beat the defence to a Steve Ferguson cross from the left to nod a header across the empty six-yard box and just wide of the far post. Early portents were not good.

United responded with their first corner on 6, Pitt's inswinger headed clear as would be the fate of almost all aerial balls flung Woking's way in the first 45 minutes. Three minutes later some neat interpassing set up home captain Neil Smith for a close-range stab that was well blocked by Herbert, who had not seen the lino's offside flag, and confirmed a confident start by the rookie keeper.

The visitors' second flag-kick on 11 was a regrettable short-corner faff-fest between Brady and Rob Wolleaston which resulted in no cross at all, confirming many fans' opinion that short corners should be banned on pain of decapitation. Woking remained generally on top, strong, quick and physical, and with the wing-backs stationed deep, United's main outlet was the long ball towards Simpson's head, but he had little joy against Woking's uncompromising back line who seemed to have singled him out as the team's danger man and gave him the treatment accordingly. Carey-Bertram, waiting vainly for a flick-on, was a peripheral figure at best.

Pitt was enjoying an intriguing duel down the left with nippy winger Goma Lambu, an even more diminutive figure than his United counterpart but just as quick and skilful.

Lambu saw a blaster blocked by Herbert on 17, and five minutes later he lured Pitt into a booking as his late challenge sent the little winger tumbling like a leaf in the wind.

Hutchinson nodded a Bunce free-kick wide on 24, and three minutes later a Ferguson flick found Sharpling stretching a leg in the six-yard box and Herbert stopped his underhit shot well. Second-best United managed a shot at last on 32 from Morrison of all people from the edge of the area, but his effort was gathered comfortably by keeper Michael Poke (stop sniggering at the back).

Simpson continued to run his heart out and challenge for every ball against fierce opposition, and it all came to a head on 38 as he picked up a booking for yet another aerial challenge. Hutchinson, an unpleasantly thuggish type with shaven head, continued to complain and jab his finger aggressively at Simpson, so much so that rookie ref Ward was obliged to book him too. Then, like the worst kind of bully, Hutchinson's colleague Karl Murray joined in and he also picked up a yellow for his trouble. Fortunately our Robbie has a splendidly calm personality and did not rise to their provocative bait.

Hutchinson still mouthed off at Simpson as play continued, and as if all that anger had produced some sort of electrical storm, half of the floodlights on each pylon went out. Pleas echoed around the ground for an electrician although one suspected that they actually needed a vet to see to the hamster who was really powering the lights.

The Simpson incident seemed to give United a much-needed kick up the backside after being second best for so long, and they finished the half with gathering strength and positivity. Or perhaps Woking just couldn't see their dark blue shirts in the gathering gloom. Smith had a snap shot blocked by centre-back Gary MacDonald on 43 and just before the half-time whistle Pitt whistled a spectacular rising drive just over the top for an encouraging finish to a generally mediocre half for the visitors.

Whether JQ had some galvanising words to offer or his side just continued their improving form into the second half, they started part two in energetic and attacking style, after an increasingly dark interval had seen the floodlights go off altogether then come on again one at a time. The break had also seen something of an exodus of United fans from one end of the terrace to the other, towards the goal they would be attacking, in an echo of times gone by. No flat caps, rosettes or rattles, though.

Within a couple of minutes Simpson had nodded a Smith cross past the post and Brady had blasted an ambitious long-ranger wide, and United seemed transformed from the hesitant lot who had started part one.

Simpson was still a marked man, and a foul on him by MacDonald on 52 gave the U's a chance to show off one of their dazzling free-kick routines: Pitt ran over the ball, Hanlon ran over the ball, then Brady curled it precisely over the bar and into Row G. Oh well.

Woking responded briefly with a break down the left which resulted in a superb sliding-tackle clearance by Hanlon, while Smith fired wide up the other end on 57. Brady became bookee number three on 59 when Bunce just nicked the ball away from his attempted tackle, but three minutes later there was no equivalent punishment for Murray when he cynically brought Simpson down when he was turned midway into the Woking half. But then he had been booked already. Perhaps Mr Ward could show us what rule permits players already on a yellow more latitude to foul unpunished than those who are not.

With Brady and Pitt warming to their tasks and dynamic midfield play from Smith and Hanlon, United were now well on top, and after hopeful long-range efforts from Murray and McAllister, the hosts replaced Sharpling with Jamie Taylor on 67. The visitors made their first change five minutes later, Liam Marum replacing the disappointing DCB, while Steve Evans came on for Neil Smith for the Cardinals at the same time.

Marum's more up-and-at-'em approach asked more questions of the Woking defence than the man he replaced and he almost created a goal on 75 when his run to the byline and cross culminated in a point-blank shot by Smith that was blocked by a desperate Simon Jackson almost on the line.

Smudger had a piledriver headed off by MacDonald a minute later as the U's turned the screws.But Woking were not dead by any means, and when Ferguson was afforded too much space outside the box on 78, his fizzer of a shot bounced horribly just in front of Herbert, who did well to paw it round for a corner. That was but a brief respite for the hosts, however, as two minutes later United took a deserved lead.

Brady's free-kick into the area was hoisted clear to Smith in space 25 yards out, and with exquisite technique, his first-time volley bounced unerringly into the bottom far corner of the net past the helplessly diving Poke. 1-0!

Such was the joy at such a fine goal on his comeback that Mr Ward evoked that most mean-spirited and dismal of rules, the booking for 'over-celebration'. And it could have been much worse for Smudger three minutes later when he tripped the fleet-footed Lambu on halfway. But as he trotted discreetly away, the quick-thinking Hanlon stepped in to apologise to the ref and it was he who picked up the yellow card. What a hero. Well, they look so alike, don't they...?

One might have expected a late onslaught from Woking, but United kept their heads and their poise and continued to use the ball intelligently, keeping possession and in fact creating more chances than their hosts. Simpson had a shot blocked on 86, Wolleaston set up Smith and his ten-yard blaster was gratefully held by Poke.

Hutchinson managed a header at goal two minutes later but it bore insufficient power to trouble Herbert's clutching hands, and Simpson tested Poke one more time before the three minutes' added time was up.

If United can show the attitude, power and teamwork of the second half next Saturday, a place in the second round will be theirs for the taking. If they display the timidity of the first half, they could be in trouble. Over to you, boys. Bring on the Histon.

Player Ratings
Herbert 8. Dream debut for the youngster: no errors, decisive and a good shouter. And a clean sheet!
Morrison 6. Got stuck in but has had many better days.
Peters 7. That wily old head kept things together at the back.
Brown 7. Creditably solid in an unfamiliar position.
Brady 7. Good, hard day's work and looks to be getting the hang of this wing-back lark.
Smith 8. Perfect comeback.
Hanlon 7. The glue that held the team together.
Wolleaston 6. Quietest of United's midfield five; not bad but can do much better.
Pitt 8. Unusually, the high mark is primarily for his defensive work. Fantastic covering job on Woking's dangerous winger, Lambu.
Carey-Bertram 6. Promised without delivering and cannot say he did enough to retain his place.
Simpson 8. Led the line with energy, determination, courage and coolness in the face of unpleasant provocation from the hosts' more brutal element.

Marum 7. Made a great case for a start next week with a very effective and dangerous twenty minutes.

Match Summary
United continued their winning away-day ways with a deserved victory at Woking for the second season running. A cautious first 45 was followed by a much more assertive second half which sets them up well for the Battle of the Century (ahem) next week.

Man of the Match
Stephen Smith. I've always believed that Smudger has what it takes and he proved it unequivocally today with a performance of energy, vision and skill, not to mention some cracking long throws. Oh, and that quite superb goal to boot!

Ref Watch: Ward 4. The baby-faced Mr Ward has a lot to learn if he is to make it to the top. Far too whistle-happy in the face of numerous innocuous challenges and far too ready to throw his cards around instead of maintaining a civilised dialogue with the players. Still young though so will hopefully improve with experience.

Soundtrack of the Day: The Hours 'Ali In The Jungle'

JB's Jukebox
Jon Brady assesses the Kingfield sounds. "Now I'm an easy-going, fair-dinkum kinda bloke. I don't ask much of the pre-match music at Conference matches, although a bit of classic, melodic rock wouldn't go amiss. But for the sake of Mary, if one thing is guaranteed to give me the irrits, it's clubs who slap on any old roo's do's that you could only enjoy if you were as full as a fat woman's underwear! Remember Stars on 45, that disco-beat medley malarkey from the early Eighties? Well they certainly do at Woking 'cos that's all they've bloody got! Sixties medley, Abba medley, Boney M medley, a flamin' Grease medley... I felt like a pickpocket at a nudists' camp, I thought I'd timewarped back to 1981! The only other music on offer was an old Dario G track just before kickoff and some old Crimbo stuff at half-time. You'd have to be about as quick as a wombat on a lazy day to enjoy that lot! JBJ verdict: 0/10!"

Andrew Bennett

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Previous match reports:
U's 0-2 St Albans
U's 1-3 Morecambe
U's 3-0 Gravesend
Grays 1-1 U's
Northwich 2-0 U's (FA Cup Qual)
U's 0-3 Oxford
U's 1-2 Crawley
U's 2-2 Altrincham
Burton 2-1 U's
U's 1-0 Stevenage
U's 1-1 Kidderminster
Forest Green 1-1 U's
U's 1-3 Exeter
Dagenham 2-0 U's
U's 1-2 Halifax
St Albans 1-1 U's
U's 0-1 Northwich Victoria

Pre-season match reports:
Histon 0-0 U's (3-4 on pens)
U's 1-3 Norwich
Fakenham 0-7 U's
Enfield FC 0-2 U's
Cambridge City 0-2 U's
U's 4-4 Ipswich
U's 0-4 West Ham
Bury Town 1-2 U's
Leyton 0-3 U's

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