Grays 2-1 U's: For whom the bell tolls
Saturday 19th January 2008 - Grays 2-1 U's: For whom the bell tolls
Your football team's haircuts really should not matter. It's not as if players at our level have the gall, or the money, to sport ludicrous designer creations like the hanging spaghetti of Arsenal's Sagna, or David Bentley's or Jermain Defoe's silly shaved shapes. But Danny Potter has had a haircut and it's, well, a bit rubbish, all lush and blond on top and short and black around the back; and somehow, one sight of that in the warm-up and I began to fear the worst at Grays today. All a bit irrational, I know, but since when has following Cambridge United had any connection with logic?
There is certainly no logic in Grays attempting to get into the Football League while based at a venue as preposterous as their Recreation Ground, but one cannot help but have a sneaking liking for the place in all its bizarre, ramshackle glory. There is the away end, a compact and bijou raised open terrace which occupies one half of the end down a cul-de-sac a couple of minutes' walk around the corner from the front of the ground, past another apartment block which is raised on huge stilts. There is the opposite end, a quaint little terrace backing onto their supporters' club. There is the sole seated side, a tiny stand about five deep.
And then there is the other side: basically a series of blocks of flats, with balconies which look out over the pitch, and an unused covered terrace in front of them which stops two-thirds of the way down to allow the teams to emerge from the ground floor of one of the blocks. Unique doesn't begin to describe it, and it will be something of a shame if they go through with their recent talk of relocation from the place, hemmed in as it is in a residential area of an otherwise thoroughly unremarkable London overflow town.
Grays even has its own pie'n'mash shop in the High Street so the displaced Cockneys don't get too homesick. The matchday programme was full of the local colour of ads for scrap metal dealers, rail labour providers, 'specialist bird clearance using trained birds of prey', Tilbury Power Station and our old friends Essex Tarpaulin Ltd, still offering to satisfy all your ratchet lashings needs, alongside unusual articles on how to collect foreign football programmes and a fascinating history of Tsu Chu, a Chinese forerunner of the modern game which dates back to Tsin Dynasty of 255 BC. I think that's about when Dean Windass started out.
There was no ad, however, for their supporters' club like last season, when its invitation to all away fans to pop in had been proven false by United supporters being refused entry, unlike in 2005-06. Many U's followers this time around fell into the Bricklayer's Arms over the road rather than risk further rejection, and most accommodating he was too.
Grays' team is in the process of a fairly successful rebuild after the last year's problems, the most recent of which was the defection of two of their best players, Stuart Thurgood and Dennis Oli, to their old boss Mark Stimson at Gillingham, and they had lost only one of their last nine league, FA Cup and Trophy games. They were skippered by ex-United trialist Jamie Stuart and one of their new signings was also an ex-U, Neil McCafferty, but he was confined to the bench after having joined from Derry City. Wonder how he looks back on his days of going out with one of Girls Aloud now? So recent were some signings that several Grays players did not even sport names on the backs of their shirts.
As for the U's, four changes were made from Wednesday's Histon debacle, Danny Brown replacing suspended Paul Carden and Stephen Reed back in for Courtney Pitt, while Josh Coulson and Lee Boylan made way for two new signings, Wayne Hatswell (ruffled bleach blond) and Lee McEvilly (shaven-headed prematurely balding John Hartson lookalike before he overdosed on pies). Boylan (hamstring) was missing from the bench, leaving no proper strikers in reserve, but there was a welcome return for Stephen Smith, sub for the first time since 17th November.
After a shower-drenched journey down the M11, the town was, remarkably, bone dry, to the relief of the occupants of the away terrace, although the grey Grays sky held a promise of inevitable rain to come as the clouds overhead scurried and scudded towards London.
The smattering of home fans in a crowd of 1,403, their second highest attendance of the season after the 1,460 who saw them play Stevenage back in September, thought it would be hilarious to shout the name of our village rivals at the start of play, which at least made them the largest number of football fans ever to chant that name.
Opening exchanges on a heavy-ish pitch with extremely muddy goalmouths were fast and competitive, United's new front pairing of McEvilly and Scott Rendell chasing everything that moved while Grays looked like a neat footballing side, equally adept at getting behind their visitors' wing-backs down the flanks or passing their way through the middle.
The hosts' slick inter-passing almost got its reward on 5 as Aaron O'Connor split the United defence with a flick-on which sent Ben Watson clear on goal ten yards out, but with all the goal at his mercy, he somehow screwed his shot wide. Let-off number one.
Let-off number two came three minutes later, this time O'Connor the recipient, but he slashed over the left-hand upright from a similar distance. United responded a minute later when McEvilly's nod sent Reed down the left, and his long cross found Dan Gleeson motoring in from the right; but he could not control his shot and it flew well over and into the impressively populated away end.
United caused more consternation in the home defence on 11 and the ball was eventually half-cleared to Mark Convery in the left channel, but his ambitious volley for the far corner also sailed into the visiting support. Grays came back on the quarter hour with a break behind Reed down the right, and O'Connor's cross found Danny Kedwell who, like his colleagues before him, slashed wide with all the goal to aim at.
Alan Power (no relation) then charged down a Reed power drive, and both sides looked to have survived the other's opening surges. United were by no means anywhere near their best and it would be fair to say Grays were marginally the better side until the deadlock was broken on 26... by the visitors.
Rob Wolleaston chased the ball down into the right-hand corner, then linked up with Gleeson; the wing-back advanced into the area, sidestepped a challenge neatly, and arrowed over a low cross to the near post where Rendell sprinted ahead of his marker to lash home from close range. 1-0!
Grays responded with a spell of pressure, O'Connor forcing a save from Potter on 29 which Mark Albrighton was forced to head to safety over his own bar. A series of corners ensued, with the United defence bolstered by its two strikers repelling boarders doughtily, and they continued to hold on, Power blasting wide on 41.
There was light relief from the PA announcer with the result of the 50/50 draw when he was pleased to say "the winning ticket was won by me, so hard luck to everybody else!" He was then constrained to announce the actual winning number to prove the veracity of his claim, but managed to get it wrong the first time around, which did not exactly leave any of his listeners convinced...
The U's finally managed to get back up the other end on 43 and a minute later Rendell was fouled by Santos Gaia to present them with a free-kick 25 yards out. Hatswell stepped up to take, but went for power and blazed over the far corner. Then Gleeson went on another rampaging run, cut into the box and was cynically blocked by Jon Ashton, but as the United man tumbled to the ground, ref Hooper waved the amber hordes' penalty claims away.
So ended a reasonably satisfactory half for United, who had lost out on the balance of play but, more importantly, had won out on the balance of goals. Part two would doubtless hold many further challenges.
United needed to hold off Grays' initial onslaught; instead, they conceded inside 45 seconds. The hosts probed down the right, Karl Murray's cross took a deflection that sent it arcing towards the far post, Potter threw himself across goal to intercept before it reached Watson, he blocked the shot, but it spun back across goal again and there was Michael Standing to poke home into the empty net from a couple of yards out. Oh dear: 1-1.
One of the handful of spectators on one of the balconies produced a bell which he rang lustily, to the disgust of the amber hordes who taunted him with the inevitable warning "We know where you live!"
Within a couple of minutes Albrighton had headed a Reed corner into the net, but U's celebrations were cut short by the ref's whistle for a push. The game was on, and conditions were made even more difficult by the arrival of swirling, horizontal rain, which was thankfully so powdery that it had little effect on the exposed away supporters.
Kedwell was withdrawn on 54 in favour of Scott Taylor, not the ex-United player but a striker on loan from MK Dons, the plastic club with the concrete cows. Potter saved comfortably from an O'Connor 18-yarder on the hour, while United responded five minutes later when Albrighton nodded Reed's corner on to Rendell who shot on the turn but saw his effort blocked by Ashton.
More danger beckoned at the United end a minute later when Cameron Mawer's mishit cross almost sneaked in at the near post, Potter tipping over, then back up the Grays end Gleeson drew a comfortable stop from home keeper David Button.
United had not looked convincing for some time, with Convery and Brown contributing little in the middle and Gleeson and Reed mostly content to lob hopeful balls in the general direction of strikers who, like Fawlty Towers guests, must have been getting gradually more frustrated at the standard of service. Que?
On 71 came a passage of play which summed up the U's malaise. Twice they should have won the ball and progressed up the field in the centre circle, twice they lost possession to a more determined sliding tackle from a Grays opponent, and eventually the hosts won a free-kick when Wolleaston fouled Power thirty yards out in the left channel. Power's long free-kick was half-cleared into the air by Morrison, and while the United players stood watching it drop from the leaden sky, Standing took charge by running in to blast a tremendous volley unchallenged past a stunned Potter from twenty yards. 2-1.
The disappointingly fading Convery was promptly replaced by Courtney Pitt, Reed moving inside, and the hosts responded by removing Watson in favour of Colin Daniel; our friend on the PA announced "I think he's making his first appearance for Grays..."
The changes made little difference to an increasingly mediocre contest, Standing sending a shot wide on 76, and three minutes later Reed was withdrawn after an ineffectual afternoon to be replaced by Robbie Willmott; he took up station wide right as United went to 3-4-3.
Grays continued to threaten, Daniel stroking wide from the edge of the area on 81, then fired up by Willmott's positive runs, United finally began to make a go of it. Rendell set up McEvilly for a clear shot at goal from twenty yards, but he went for power and blazed a rising drive just over the angle, then Willmott's cross set up the newbie for another blaster that was headed for the top corner until deflected narrowly over.
More searching crosses followed from the youngster, and four minutes from time Rendell had a chance to equalise but his low drive was well smothered by Button. With three added minutes signalled, Pitt cut inside to drive just over, Potter saved from a Murray shot, and Hatswell met Pitt's corner at the far post to head for goal only to see his effort blocked away from near the post for another flag-kick. Pitt then summed up United's day by sending his last corner sailing hopelessly over everybody and harmlessly out of danger.
United have achieved many close one-goal wins this season, so we know that the margin between success and failure is small. But now the former Invincibles seem to have fallen down the other side of the divide and the points are slipping through their fingers as the gap between them and the teams above them grows.
The players have lost an edge somewhere in the last month or so, and with it appears to have gone some self-belief. On its day this team is as good as any in this division; it has proved it many times already. But results do not just happen. They must make them happen. And that means straining every sinew, attacking with confidence, and believing that they WILL prevail. JQ knows this, and has signed some fighters to bolster his troops. Now it's time to go to war. Ring out, wild bells.
Statto Corner
United's run of four consecutive defeats in all competitions is their worst sequence since they lost seven games in a row, starting with that FA Trophy drubbing at Histon on 16th December 2006. They were subsequently overcome by Rushden (twice), Burton, Kidderminster, Stafford and Stevenage, before finally thrashing Woking 3-0 on 27th January 2007.
Lee McEvilly is the seventh player with that first name to sport the black and amber since 1970. Name the others... OK, they were: Blackburn, Boylan, Charles, Middleton, Palmer and Philpott. He has played three times against the U's, all for Rochdale between September 2002 and August 2003, and scored once each in two 2-2 draws, once at the Abbey and once at Spotland. The other game was a classic 4-3 defeat for United.
Wayne Hatswell is the fourth Wayne to play for the U's since 1970, after Messrs Ebanks, Andrews and Purser. He has played against United on seven occasions, firstly for Oxford in March 2001, then twice for Kidderminster in 2004 and 2005, then four times for Rushden, twice last season and twice this, including in the Setanta Shield. He scored once, for Kidderminster in a 1-1 draw and was on the winning side four times, losing twice.
Hatswell's allocation of the number 27 jersey means that is now the most popular squad number for United since they were introduced in the 1999-2000 season. He is the sixteenth player to have been given that number, following Rob Miller, Darren Howe, Dan Chillingworth, Stephen Jordan, David Theobald, Michael Shinn, Gilbert Prilasnig, Dennis Oli, Amadou Konte, Iwan Roberts, Jamie Waite, Liam Norval, Christian 'Brick Wall' Smith, Craig Hughes and Marvellous Marvin Robinson. Next most popular number has been 25 (fifteen players) while only one player has ever been given numbers 36, 37 and 39, while numbers 51 and 52 have been allocated to auction-winning supporters.
Player Ratings
Potter 7. Vocal as ever (he's easier to hear in these little grounds) and cannot be blamed for either goal.
Albrighton 7. A few terrific tackles.
Morrison 6. Stuck to his task fairly well in the centre of the back three.
Hatswell 6. Decent debut and looks likely to be an excellent signing once he settles in.
Gleeson 6. Best performance for months, although that's not saying much, and deserves great credit for the United goal. Keep getting forward.
Brown 5. Still, I'm afraid, a weak link in midfield, and some of his passing suggested a need to visit SpecSavers. Other optical outlets are also available.
Wolleaston 6. Some decent runs without being as influential as we know he can be.
Convery 5. Started fairly well, but has yet to convince that he is worthy of a permanent starting place.
Reed 5. Disappointing, caught out defensively too often and a lot of very poor hit-and-hope punts in the vague direction of the forwards conceded possession far too often.
McEvilly 6. Reasonable introduction to the team and showed enough to suggest he could be a very useful signing if afforded the ammunition.
Rendell 6. Never stopped trying and rewarded with a classic poacher's goal. Needs better service.
Pitt 4. His baffling inability to deliver a decent corner/free-kick/cross continues to frustrate.
Willmott 7. The youngster showed Pitt how it is done with some splendid wing play in the last ten minutes.
Match Summary
United's slump continued with a deserved defeat by Grays in which the U's were second best in every department: tackling, teamwork, creativity, you name it, Grays were better at it. Get those carrots and sticks ordered, JQ, before it is too late.
Man of the Match
Mark Albrighton. Just about the only United player to do himself full justice.
Ref Watch
Hooper 7. Declined a decent penalty shout by Gleeson and gave a few too many unnecessary free-kicks, but generally pretty sound.
Non-League Player's Name of the Week
Erith & Belvedere's positively Dickensian Aiden Pursglove.
Soundtrack of the Day
The Little Ones 'Face The Facts'
The MP3 Files
Mark Peters lends an ear to the Recreation Ground sounds. "Being of a certain age, I tend not to listen to Radio One any more, populated as it is by pratty DJs who think being vulgar is funny, and most of the music they play is so bland and forgettable it should be renamed Radio Beige! If only good old Tommy Vance were still around to liven things up with some Classic Rock, eh? Grays stuck to the 'current hits' format with some really dull stuff by the likes of Rihanna, Amy MacDonald, Booty Luv and Scouting For Girls, who sound just like Pilot to me.
"They also played a track from the new Crowded House album, which I have found quite disappointing to be honest, and the only surprise was the bizarre and totally random airing of 'Afternoons and Coffeespoons' by Crash Test Dummies, which was at least different! Otherwise, like the match itself, it was an afternoon to forget! Hwyl! MP3 verdict: 2/10."
Andrew Bennett
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